Hello dearest followers. We haven’t posted for a few days but what a fun packed few days it has been. We kicked of the weekend with one of our favourite activities; renting quad bikes, mopeds and a golf buggy to tour the island. This was kind of Dan’s last leaving activity as well so we tried to make the most of the time we had. However, as is typical of our motoring experiences on the island a few problems managed to get in the way of full enjoyment of this activity. 

First on the way to Pumpkin Hill Beach, I (James) managed to burst the tyre of my quad bike in the middle of nowhere. So after a long trek to the beach and a little bit of snorkelling I had to drive the quad back at – 5 mph to the garage where they kindly changed the (bald) tyre. After a little lunch and a new tyre we proceeded to the freshwater caves to show the new guys the erotic delights of al fresco swimming. However on the journey back from kinky time motoring disaster struck again. Growing in confidence with a moped, Rogan was trying his luck at riding faster than normal. Consequently he had a little accident in which he and Julia went skidding across the gravel floor. Medical attention followed and $20 debt followed that. In an attempt to emulate Rogan’s impressive accident, Graham, not wanting to be left out had one as well. However his attempt was pathetic and he grazed his foot, he seemed to do more damage to the tree he hit than himself. Boo-frickedy-hoo! 

After the adrenaline and injury filled Saturday, a relaxing day at the beach was required. The most memorable thing that happened on this day was an assault of the eyes and nose by two young dogs who found it necessary to shit either side of our beach area.

Sof and laura are having issues of their own as well. Having been here for many weeks ( I have lost count, they have probably out stayed their visa though and they won‘t let us watch Prison Break) they are finally trying to leave the island. This isn’t going to plan though, even though it is quite simple, it may be that they have been lost here for weeks and didn’t tell anyone. We think they want to go to Costa Rica, but they still haven’t left. They were supposed to leave on Thursday but they are still here. Im not even sure they know where Costa Rica is. I think a map is probably the solution. 

People’s bowels are also on the move. Kirstin has been a little unwell all week and now I have the bug. Expect to see me in the Guinness Book of World records next year as the man doing the most shits in a day (at least 10) and for the poo that most looks like Guinness. Sof has had a similar condition as well but is less liberal when it comes to describing poo and toilet etiquette.

Monday also brought a new working schedule and longer opening hours. The volunteers have been split in to two teams who rotate on a four day basis. Those who work four days get the following four days off whilst the other team works. We are also open from 12 – 5 every day.

In late night shenanigans and after copious alcohol consumption, Claire Rogan and Dave got a police escort home. Not for minor disturbances of the peace but because they are clearly suave and sophisticated people capable of charming Spanish speaking officers into being chauffeurs. After multiple nights out we have realised that Julia has now replaced Imogen as the Station party animal.

Volka and Cecilia (new arrivals) went night time turtle patrolling too this week and were fortunate enough to observe a turtle make two false nests. However they also discovered that; a) they are not very strong or, b) we have teenage mutant ninja turtles on the island as they could not manage to restrain the turtle for biometric measurement. I think that option b is the most likely.

In other animal news our recently captured juvenile swamper ‘Nilley’ will hopefully be released to day.

Now we close with a plea to the outside world. This morning whilst collecting my shit tablets (for the shits) I saw a truck crammed with five Honduran soldiers driving down the main strip. The air was also filled with the sound of aircraft flying fast and low. Needless to say that last night a plane full of drugs was flown onto the island. If you do not hear from us either; a) assume the worst it wasn’t drugs and there has been another coup, or b) we got caught and have been arrested, please phone the British Embassy.

Disclaimer: If we do not reply for a while, do not contact the British Embassy, this would be wasting the authorities time. It would be more likely that we haven’t replied because we couldn’t be arsed. Furthermore we don’t actually know that much about the drugs raid so if the Honduran authorities are reading this, please do not arrest us.


~ by iguana321 on June 30, 2011.

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